This is one of those times, haha.
I'm put to ease a little bit more, just because you answered to me. I felt like you were mad at me, but to know you just fell asleep puts my nerves to rest.
I still do feel bad for being such a shitty friend to you lately. I don't know what's going on with me. I've kind of been a bad friend to EVERYONE. Ashley, you, Holly, my dad. Not sure what's up.
Maybe it's that I've been on a weird schedule. I've been sleeping all afternoon, and obviously when I'd be texting people during school, I don't. It's probably because I haven't wanted to plug in my phone during the night. It's been dying on me a lot. It still doesn't excuse my shitty friendness.
I hope I'll fix things after posting this. I'm charging my phone up as I type this, so it better not die tomorrow. I promise to text you back EVERY time you text me. Haha, okay, probably not really, both of us end up dying at the end of conversations anyways.
So anyways. Now that I've fucked up everything by something that I don't even know what it is, I'm ready to get back to my wonderful friend status. :)
WHO WANTS TO BE MY BIFFLE !?
Thursday, April 30, 2009
Wednesday, April 29, 2009
I'm kind of done with you;
and I never really realized it, either. I guess I was too busy trying to be your friend to notice who you really were.
You're so annoying, though. You think you're so much better than everyone. You think you're so fucking mature. You're really not. You're just a little kid. Inside you're just as lost as the rest of us, and you know it. Just because you've had sex with every guy you've dated doesn't make you wise. Just because you've hit rock bottom doesn't mean the rest of us still will. I don't love you, so stop telling me you love me. I know you don't, anyway. Stop asking me what you'd do without me; we all know you'd be just the same. I can see right through you, and I'm so glad I can.
I'm tired of your constant talk of drugs. I'm tired of you telling my friends to try them out. You're a loser because of that 'badass pot' you smoked, or that 'fucking sick' coke you snorted. I'm laughing at you, not with you.
Maybe five years ago I wanted to be your best friend, but now I'll run as far away from that as I can.
I hope you ruin your life, like you so badly want to. I hope you realize what you're doing, and what you've done. You've fucked up everything pure in your life, and good luck getting it back.
You're so annoying, though. You think you're so much better than everyone. You think you're so fucking mature. You're really not. You're just a little kid. Inside you're just as lost as the rest of us, and you know it. Just because you've had sex with every guy you've dated doesn't make you wise. Just because you've hit rock bottom doesn't mean the rest of us still will. I don't love you, so stop telling me you love me. I know you don't, anyway. Stop asking me what you'd do without me; we all know you'd be just the same. I can see right through you, and I'm so glad I can.
I'm tired of your constant talk of drugs. I'm tired of you telling my friends to try them out. You're a loser because of that 'badass pot' you smoked, or that 'fucking sick' coke you snorted. I'm laughing at you, not with you.
Maybe five years ago I wanted to be your best friend, but now I'll run as far away from that as I can.
I hope you ruin your life, like you so badly want to. I hope you realize what you're doing, and what you've done. You've fucked up everything pure in your life, and good luck getting it back.
Monday, April 27, 2009
There's gotta be something wrong
Here's a list of things I love and hate
HATE:
I hate being shy.
I hate having crushes.
I hate being self conscious.
I hate rude musicians.
I hate feeling creepy.
I hate distance between people I love.
I hate tai food.
I hate homework.
I hate failing.
I hate competition.
I hate conflict.
I hate my mind.
I hate feeling dirty. (literally)
I hate my slow computer.
I hate slow google maps.
I hate when my favorite bands break up.
I hate that I hate so many things.
LOVE:
I love music.
I love family.
I love red lipstick.
I love friends.
I love sleeping.
I love relaxation, the few times I can get to it.
I love traveling.
I love realizing I've made a new best friend.
I love praise.
I love talking about the reign of kindo.
I love pepsi.
I love ice cream.
I love rainy days.
I love reading.
I love debating.
I love seattle's music scene.
I love seattle...as a whole.
I love portland.
I love brand new (yes, they get their own)
I love taking a good photograph.
I love learning a hard part on bass.
I love singing and dancing badly...by myself.
I love day dreaming.
I love writing.
I love being sarcastic.
I love laughing.
I love not worrying about money, the few times I don't have to.
I love v-necks.
I love vintage clothing.
I love dying my hair.
I love having red hair.
I love playing with eyeshadow.
I love feeling loved.
Sunday, April 26, 2009
Cause love is nothing to waste, and I swore
never your heart shall I break.
I didn't mean to offend you; I'm just trying to help. I don't like seeing you so confused, and I don't like him either, for doing it to you.
You're not helping your situation by wishing for him though. I wish you would see that too, instead of saying it doesn't hurt to wish. It does, it does.
As long as your willing to put up with it, I am. It just doesn't make me happy seeing you unhappy.
I didn't mean to offend you; I'm just trying to help. I don't like seeing you so confused, and I don't like him either, for doing it to you.
You're not helping your situation by wishing for him though. I wish you would see that too, instead of saying it doesn't hurt to wish. It does, it does.
As long as your willing to put up with it, I am. It just doesn't make me happy seeing you unhappy.
My heart is caught in a landslide
I'm still on an Eisley kick. I thought about changing the music to Socratic, after humming Boy in a Magazine to myself, but then decided against it.
Uh, so, blog. Today. I completely forgot what I was going to talk about. It was something good, too. Hm...
Well, I finished a book today. It was called Apart From the Crowd. So good. It made me cry. Anna McPartlin is seriously a phenomenal writer. Fucking aye. I also developed a serious want to visit Ireland. Fucking aye x 2.
Uh, let's see, what else...
After completely lurking Sarah's blog, I came across the fact that Christofer Drew is a complete asshole, not only in Houston, but all over the world ! Hahahaha. Seriously though, you're 17 (maybe 18 now...I'm not sure) you've got fan girls all over the US, a big future is in the horizon, so why don't you thank the people who're giving you this oppurtunity. I can promise you, Mr Ingle, that without fans, you'll never get anywhere in life. So why don't you treat your fans like gold, so they feel the need to spread the word about your music, not about how you completely let them down ? I wish I could meet him so I could have a word with him, but of course...he's the most impossible person to meet...ever. Haha
I need to pee...really badly.
Bye !
PS. LOL LAURA JUST SAID DECLARATION OF DEPENDENCE. I love her.
Uh, so, blog. Today. I completely forgot what I was going to talk about. It was something good, too. Hm...
Well, I finished a book today. It was called Apart From the Crowd. So good. It made me cry. Anna McPartlin is seriously a phenomenal writer. Fucking aye. I also developed a serious want to visit Ireland. Fucking aye x 2.
Uh, let's see, what else...
After completely lurking Sarah's blog, I came across the fact that Christofer Drew is a complete asshole, not only in Houston, but all over the world ! Hahahaha. Seriously though, you're 17 (maybe 18 now...I'm not sure) you've got fan girls all over the US, a big future is in the horizon, so why don't you thank the people who're giving you this oppurtunity. I can promise you, Mr Ingle, that without fans, you'll never get anywhere in life. So why don't you treat your fans like gold, so they feel the need to spread the word about your music, not about how you completely let them down ? I wish I could meet him so I could have a word with him, but of course...he's the most impossible person to meet...ever. Haha
I need to pee...really badly.
Bye !
PS. LOL LAURA JUST SAID DECLARATION OF DEPENDENCE. I love her.
Wednesday, April 22, 2009
Life is good
Yep. Life is good. Things are going my way today.
The last couple weeks have been weird. I've wanted numerous times to post one of my depressed blogs, but I over came that want, and now I'm greeting you with a happy blog. :> Happy faces included.
I officially believe in praying again, by the way. I don't know how many times I asked God last night to make my day better than what it had been yesterday, and you know what ? It totally was ! I asked him for a couple of other things, which also came true. My dad totally reads this though, so I'm not going into those things. Dads aren't meant to read about boys.
ANYWAYS. Something I found really interesting today was that I was talking to my geometry teacher, and she's been in an awful mood lately. I mean, she likes me regardless, but she's just been in a mad mood towards everyone else lately. So, today in first period (geometry is fifth) we were learning about India, where my teacher is from, so I made a point to ask her about it. I finally did, in the last 30 minutes of class, and her mood just completely flipped. She was super nice again, like she was a couple weeks earlier. It was cool seeing her eyes light up when I asked what state she was from. We talked about it for awhile. It was interesting.
I really love hearing people's stories. I thought about that today, and then I remembered why I even wanted to be a journalist in the first place. It was nice to be reminded of that.
PS. The editor of the newspaper really liked my golf article. GO ME. AND GO YOU FOR WISHING ME GOOD LUCK. :D
The last couple weeks have been weird. I've wanted numerous times to post one of my depressed blogs, but I over came that want, and now I'm greeting you with a happy blog. :> Happy faces included.
I officially believe in praying again, by the way. I don't know how many times I asked God last night to make my day better than what it had been yesterday, and you know what ? It totally was ! I asked him for a couple of other things, which also came true. My dad totally reads this though, so I'm not going into those things. Dads aren't meant to read about boys.
ANYWAYS. Something I found really interesting today was that I was talking to my geometry teacher, and she's been in an awful mood lately. I mean, she likes me regardless, but she's just been in a mad mood towards everyone else lately. So, today in first period (geometry is fifth) we were learning about India, where my teacher is from, so I made a point to ask her about it. I finally did, in the last 30 minutes of class, and her mood just completely flipped. She was super nice again, like she was a couple weeks earlier. It was cool seeing her eyes light up when I asked what state she was from. We talked about it for awhile. It was interesting.
I really love hearing people's stories. I thought about that today, and then I remembered why I even wanted to be a journalist in the first place. It was nice to be reminded of that.
PS. The editor of the newspaper really liked my golf article. GO ME. AND GO YOU FOR WISHING ME GOOD LUCK. :D
Tuesday, April 14, 2009
Just know I loved you when I hit the ground
What. The. Fuck.
How do I write an article on golf? Or more importantly, how do I write an article about a golf tournament I KNOW NOTHING ABOUT?
Epic fail.
In other news:
I kind of love Ace Enders...a lot lately. I've been listening to him constantly, and I still don't think I'm done listening to him. Hopefully this isn't going to be like a month long thing, but I don't know.
Someone tell him stop making such good music. Along with that, tell him to stop writing such great lyrics. Also! Tell him to stop making them so darn helpful.
I wish I could have seen him last time he came. I wish he would come back soon, too.
Next topic:
How do I write an article on golf? Or more importantly, how do I write an article about a golf tournament I KNOW NOTHING ABOUT?
Epic fail.
In other news:
I kind of love Ace Enders...a lot lately. I've been listening to him constantly, and I still don't think I'm done listening to him. Hopefully this isn't going to be like a month long thing, but I don't know.
Someone tell him stop making such good music. Along with that, tell him to stop writing such great lyrics. Also! Tell him to stop making them so darn helpful.
I wish I could have seen him last time he came. I wish he would come back soon, too.
Next topic:
he is so beautiful.
oh.my.god.
I don't understand why God feels the need to make people who look like that. I mean, and Jesse Lacey? What the hell, God? Why? Don't even get me started on Nic Newsham.
Laura and I have been on the same page when it comes to guys lately. It's making me pretty happy. All we talk about it Nic Newsham and Envy. It's great, hahaha.
or-ay-gone. or-ah-ghin.
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